Hook up fails: When flirting goes wrong

Hook up fails: When flirting goes wrong

Between Tinder, Facebook and the rampant hedonism Dubai exudes, it’s never been easier to get a date. Flirting is a second language to this city’s men, most of whom are fluent in the art of sweet nothings and puppy dog eyes. But even the most silver-tongued Casanova doesn’t always get...
Fitness challenge: The gym alternatives

Fitness challenge: The gym alternatives

Sport was never my forte at school. Blessed with the coordination and physical prowess of a club-footed, Quaalude-stuffed donkey, I have difficulty getting my car out of the drive without sustaining injuries to myself or immediate surroundings.Combine this with an extreme dislike of ritual humiliation, cold weather and being told...
Tinder: Dubai style

Tinder: Dubai style

The love child of disposable consumer culture and front-facing phone cameras, Tinder has become one of the most popular dating apps across the world. With more than 10 million active daily users, creators have even introduced a threesome version, for those who felt that the ‘hot or not’ casual sex...
The Big US Road Trip: Tennessee

The Big US Road Trip: Tennessee

Gatlinburg Tennessee is a tiny holiday town full of fake moonshine, gun shops, plastic tourist toot and more refined sugar than I’ve ever seen before in a square mile radius. It’s also one of the gateways to the Smoky Mountains National Park. (That’s Dolly Parton’s homeland y’all.) Though we’d initially...
The Big US Road Trip: Georgia

The Big US Road Trip: Georgia

Apparently Savannah is the most haunted town in America. But whilst it was definitely one of my favourite road trip spots on the tour, I can’t say it filled me with the major spooks. After arriving at 2pm, we spent an afternoon pottering round the hot and sweaty streets of...
The Big US Road Trip: NOLA Part 2

The Big US Road Trip: NOLA Part 2

The more times I turn 21, the more difficult the morning after becomes. Luckily New Orleans is well-equipped to deal with hangovers. Not wanting to miss out on the local cuisine, we went to SoBou, another Trip Advisor recommended spot in the French Quarter. Despite the whackadoodles who often frequent those review...
The Big US Road Trip: New Orleans (Part 1)

The Big US Road Trip: New Orleans (Part 1)

New Orleans wasn’t the next stop on our tour. But the American guy I’m currently dating (who claims to be from New Orleans but is actually from a much crappier town five hours down the road) has requested that I bump it up the blogging queue before he leaves Dubai...
The Big US Road Trip: Florida

The Big US Road Trip: Florida

Perhaps it’s the effects of a teenage addiction to Sweet Valley High books and McDonald’s fries. Perhaps it’s my deep seated love of fried chicken. For whatever reason, a US road trip has been on my bucket list for at least the last 15 years. As I live in Dubai,...
Latest entries
The worst date ever

The worst date ever

  Most dates are a banal sort of affair. A bland Starbucks-fuelled chat between two people who find each other moderately pleasant and moderately attractive. Occasionally you get lovely dates, which involve laughing, a shared penchant for melted cheese and full-frontal snogging. And finally, there’s the weird. I always thought my handcrafted ‘worst date of...

How justice failed Reeva

Oscar Pistorious killed his girlfriend. Except he didn’t just kill ‘his girlfriend’, did he? He killed Reeva Steenkamp, an independent, successful woman, whose name barely gets a passing mention in the articles concerning her death. Reeva was a South African model who supported her family through her career. She took part in awareness campaigns on...
Whatever happened to man gardens?

Whatever happened to man gardens?

I’m pretty sure the word ‘Brazilian’ was where it all started going wrong for our poor little fannies. As if naming a wax job after a country full of permanently bronzed sex gods would make us forget the pain, anguish and emotional trauma of having our foofs stripped barer than Tiny Tim’s Christmas Goose. Until...
Online dating survival guide

Online dating survival guide

If you thought the development of technology was going to make your quest for love easier, think again. Complicating communication rituals and blurring the lines for acceptable forms of dumping (text? Facebook? Silence followed by a passive aggressive tweet?), it’s not all a bed of digital rose emojis. When you spread your little wings and...
The no bullshit guide to anti-ageing

The no bullshit guide to anti-ageing

In your teens you spend every Friday night caking make up on your face in a desperate attempt to look old enough to be legally served alcopops. Then suddenly your late twenties hit and it’s a downward spiral into three day hangovers and the murky underworld of overpriced collagen boosting products.  Ever since a date...
Types of online daters

Types of online daters

Free dating sites aren’t exactly conducive to finding a lifelong partner. But ever since you started having to pay 30p for a wee at the train station, love is basically the only good thing about life that remains free. For that reason, I’m mildly reluctant to splurge the £30 a month price tag of the...
Top 5 beauty treatments to avoid

Top 5 beauty treatments to avoid

In the 90s, beautification mostly revolved around green hair mascara and collecting as many Rimmel products as a £3.50 an hour Saturday job would allow. Convinced our teenage heartthrobs would be instantly smitten by our Rachel hairstyles and lilac nail varnish, we would saunter out of the changing rooms in gym knickers and a gas...
30 Before 30

30 Before 30

Earlier this year a lovely Twitter friend of mine Hannah Berry (@sitemanagergal) died from cancer. Although I’d never met her in person, I found her energy, positivity and sense of humour incredibly inspiring. She was only 30 years old when she passed away, which (for lack of more eloquent wording), is totally fucking shit. As...
What not to do at a wedding

What not to do at a wedding

After a year preparing for my best friend’s wedding, I’ve been on a (somewhat inevitable) anticlimax since the main event. (PWD? Google it. Pretty sure it’s an actual medical thing.) I love a good wedding. From the weepy bit in church (it’s like seven episodes of Pet Rescue rolled into one) to the bit at...
Single clichés translated

Single clichés translated

When you’re a single girl rapidly hurtling towards the big 3-0, your relationship status will be more enthusiastically dissected by well-meaning friends and strangers than British weather reports. As you sip champagne in your overpriced hat from Debenhams this wedding season, learn to spot the singleton clichés- and how to fight your corner.   What...
How British are you?

How British are you?

Contrary to the barely literate mumblings of the EDL, becoming a fully-fledged member of the British public isn’t as simple as getting bladdered in a Union Jack mini dress. Aside from passports, documents, visas and employment certificates, there’s the tricky little badger of the UK citizenship test to pass. Having tried (and failed) to answer...
Do you think my arse is the size of a small country? (And other difficult questions.)

Do you think my arse is the size of a small country? (And other difficult questions.)

  Aside from a home highlighting ‘incident’ (of which we never speak), I’m reasonably low maintenance when it comes to getting ready. But for many of my girlfriends it’s a different story. From shoe choice enquiries to wondering whether that new dress makes them resemble a rare species of Walrus, I often wonder how their boyfriends...
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